6 Months of Motherhood – The Lessons Learned

The Madd-a-roo at 6 months already! We’ve doubled our height, tripled our weight and are well on our way to causing mass destruction and mayhem.  I alternate between curling up on the bathroom floor rocking back and forth and mumbling “I just want my life back” and proudly showing her off every chance I get. I’m still convinced she is the cutest baby on the planet, which has saved her from being listed on eBay on several occasions.

Kiss my foot!

After  three more months, I’ve added significantly to my motherhood comprehension, tactics and tools. Here are some goodies from my mommy (survival) journal:

It isn’t a coincidence. The baby will always wake when your dinner is ready. Just accept it and move on. You can bang away in the kitchen chopping, flipping, cleaning dishes for an hour or more, but the moment the food is ready to be consumed…. you have an extra place to set.

The amount of books, magazines and blogs you read about when the baby will finally sleep through the night is directly proportionate to how many weeks longer it will take. A cruel twist of fate. I suspect Motherhood magazines are secretly published by Folgers.

At four months+, babies are like snails. You never actually see them move but when you turn your back for even an instant, they are never how or where you left them. I’m constantly reminded of the Dr Who episode with the angels – Don’t Blink!

Dog toys and baby toys look a lot alike but are NOT interchangeable. The dog thinks they are the same. The baby thinks they are the same. It’s all up to you.

Baby Einstein is a blessing and a curse. You put in the DVD not really expecting much… and it happens – like a moth to a flame the baby is completely mesmerized… all of a sudden you can use the bathroom alone! Happy day! But it starts to get easier and easier to flip it on for a quick “fix” of peace and the opportunity to refill your tea…. then you realize that you have memorized the entire program…. and the happy people dancing about in friendly colors start to eat your brain…. and the music makes your eyeballs itch….. but you can’t not turn it on… so you buy MORE Baby Einstein episodes to keep your head from exploding at the thought of having to listen to that one 20 minute DVD yet another time…..

So that is the latest (coherent) news from Camp Crazy, and I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again – never open a box of wine with a knife.


One Comment Add yours

  1. prisdiblasi says:

    You said it all and so well……but she’s sooooo cute.

    Date: Thu, 7 Feb 2013 22:43:53 +0000 To: prisdiblasi@hotmail.com

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